Cable Your Own Sundae

Cable should be modeled after make your own sundae.

Except instead of sprinkles, nuts, hot fudge, and a cherry on top it's Comedy Central, FX, MTV, and VH1. Or whatever your pleasure. That's the point.

I put this discussion in a script I wrote back in college but since I started this blog it seems like the perfect place to put all of my if-only-I-put-this-kind-of-attention-to-stuff-that-could-help-people or at the very least make-me-some-money-so-I-don't-have-to-commute-4-hours- to-&-from-work-everyday. Phew. Let's get going.

Raise your hand if you surf more channels than you tread on. Me too. So let's put aside the logistical problem of the networks, various cable and pay channels all agreeing on this and assume that they do. You start with your base- vanilla, chocolate, strawberry? ABC, NBC, CBS? How about all 3? Done. The sundae's going to cost a little more, but that should be obvious. The more you choose the more you pay. You'll save more in the long run because you can tell channels such as Fox News to fuck off. I certainly would. Imagine running down the list of channels, much like you would the list of toppings for a sundae. "I'll take this, this, this, and this. Thank you, goodnight." And really this could just be an alternative to paying for the big block of shitbag channels they give you- Comcast and friends don't have to do away with their current packages, just add this one to the options. As for the channels you already pay additional costs for, up their per channel price. If you want reeses peanut butter cups as your topping than those cost more- same goes for channels like HBO, Cinemax and Showtime. So now that you're fully aware that I'm psychotic let me know what you think. What would your lineup be?

HGTV, FX, A&E, Comedy Central, TNT, MTV, VH1, Discovery, HBO, Showtime, IFC and Bravo...I'd eat the shit out of that sundae.